The Steubenville Takeaway

Why?

If you've ever spent an extended amount of time with a toddler, you've heard this question. After the recent Steubenville conviction I find myself thinking of those tiny voices pressing for answers.

A friend of mine recently had her 3rd child, a little girl. As the pictures of her make their rounds on Facebook, people compliment her looks, muse on her features and congratulate her parents on their good fortune. Not once in any of the comments did anyone say 'Statistically your daughter has a 1 in 6 chance of being a rape victim! Hope she's not that 1!'

I have 4 nieces. Beautiful, bright, funny girls who bring a smile to my face just with the thought of them. I also have 4 nephews that I adore just a much. If it were up to me they would live in a world without any hint of harm or hurt for them or any child for that matter.

But that's not life. There is hurt and pain and disappointment in our everyday. Some lasts seconds, others lifetimes. The duration does not matter. What does matter is how we learn and grow in the aftermath of what has happened. This belief doesn't just apply to when something happens to you, but even when it happens to others.

My eldest nephew once accidentally brushed his teeth with A&D ointment.  Other than a little scare and literally a horrible taste left in his mouth, he was fine. He has two younger siblings. Neither of them has had that same experience. Why? The same A&D was in their house, kept in the same place, that hadn't changed. No, what was different for his younger siblings was that when it came time to brush their teeth, they had an older, experienced brother who knew the toothpaste from the ointment. His unfortunate experience has spared them similar experiences.

So now that we've all made it thru the shock of the initial incident in Steubenville, the resulting investigation, trail and conviction, what comes next?

For a lot of people nothing. They're done shaking their heads about the unfortunate matter of it all and back to fretting over their own daily worries. For others it will linger in the back of their minds, a reminder of things they hate about our society yet feel it's too big to change or effect on their own.

I find myself to be one of those people who often has matters like these linger in the back of my mind. I'm no superhero. I can barely change the sheets on my bed without feeling like I'm owed a two weeks all expenses paid vacation in Hawaii, let alone lead a revolution against sexual assault. But doing nothing, that's not an option.

So what am I going to do? I'm going to remember that there are 8 kids in my life that are counting on my experiences and knowledge to make it thru. So what do I pass on to them that I learned from this debacle?

I pass on that your actions don't just effect you. When you do something it doesn't just effect you. Those boys didn't just hurt their peer that night. Yes she carries the brunt of the physical and mental scars but she's not the only one. The families involved, the community of Steubenville and even further beyond has been effected. Consequences aren't apparent in the moments before you act. Yes, even though you know that what you do doesn't stop at your door, you'll still make mistakes. But if you act with consideration, not only of yourself but of the people around you, you're less likely that those mistakes will be the kind like Steubenville's. None of us lives in a bubble. So we have to do everything we can to be caring and considerate of each other at every opportunity.